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Wanted: a thick skin

5 Oct

Warning: Self-indulgent blog post.

Why do I blog? A question I often ask when I’ve sat up into the wee small hours writing a post and only my husband and mother (god bless ‘em for their loyalty) read it. Bloggers are warned not to get fixated on site stats but is there anyone who doesn’t?

Over the past few days, I’ve been asking myself “Why do I blog?” in the sense of “Why do I blog when sh*t like that can happen?”. I’ve ranted so much about my little blog’s eventful week that my rant tank is empty. So I’ll cut a long story short. A well-intentioned post of mine has caused offence to a couple of people. When I say “a couple” I don’t mean any more than that, I literally mean two. (Well, there were three but one was less abusive so I don’t count them.) One word describes how I felt about the force and manner of their reaction: gobsmacked. If you feel hard done by and want three words to encompass the fact I was asked to take the post down: knocked for six.

Ricocheting between tears of sadness and tears of indignation, I could quite easily have deleted my blog and my Twitter account. Social media suicide, I guess – the fashionable, techie way to do a Reggie Perrin in the 21st century.  It struck me like a great big sledgehammer that however little visited my blog might be it is still very public property and as such I am (as is any blogger) an unwitting target for the less polite, less measured people who inhabit the blogo- and Twitterspheres.

As a sensitive type, I find it easier to express my thoughts via a blog than I do when I’m required to think on my feet face-to-face. Yes, I hide behind a screen and in doing so can invest a lot of myself in what I write. What I’ve learnt over the past week is that if I want to be a happy blogger I must get myself a thicker skin. If I blog for me and for the people who are interested in what I write then why should I care what random people who stumble across an isolated post of mine think? Easier said than done.

J. R.  Bowen (I’m presuming this isn’t Jim) says that “The cyber bully is nothing more than a coward with a gadget”.  That’s something to remember on those days when your epidermis is feeling paper-thin.  Perhaps those bullies will learn that debate is more important than trying to dictate. In the meantime I’ll be shaving my skin to make it grow back thicker. Or is that my moustache?

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Wanted: new knickers

26 Nov

I received a tweet today from the lovely Mammasaurus asking where the nelly I’ve been and whether I’ve lost my ‘mojo’. I feel like my bra strap has been twanged. Rightly so – my blog has been sadly neglected for a couple of months. At the moment I don’t even feel entitled to call myself a ‘blogger’. I’m more like a ‘blogged’. As for my mojo, well I’ve had a peek and I think it’s still there (unfortunately only in the blogging sense). I’ve felt a couple of twinges anyhow.

Trouble is, I’m a lazy little blogger. I sit and wait for inspiration for strike. This approach is probably quite effective unless, like me, you’re so knackered that inspiration would have to knock several times with a sledgehammer before any brain cells flickered into life. Much of my inspiration comes from people I know or have met and, when I wasn’t on maternity leave, office life. The problem is, this has enormous potential to offend. There’s been many a time when I’ve been itching to put fingers to keyboard but concluded that the likelihood of offence far outweighed the amusement value. I live in a small city where seven degrees of separation is six degrees too many – I rarely speak without checking over my shoulder and certainly never venture an opinion on someone as more often than not it will turn out I’m talking to their closest friend.

Looking back at topics that have inspired me in the past, I could blame the below for my silence (although somewhere in there should be demanding children and Twitter addiction):

  • I’ve accepted that the Jeremy Vine Show on Radio 2 is an insufferable mix of high and low brow, I can’t do anything about it and I’m tired of ranting about it (lest I should turn into the type of ranty person who calls into his show – god forbid).
  • I’ve accepted that keeping pink and princesses out of my 3-year-old’s life is a losing battle. Bring on the sparkles, I can handle it.
  • The weather’s turned cold and women have stopped getting their boobies out in the name of women’s rights. Shame.

Is my blogger’s block therefore because I’m too accepting? Perhaps I need to go back to what I do best – getting my knickers in a twist. And if I want to go from ‘blogged’ to ‘blogger’ then I’d better find a big pair.

Bare naked lady

30 Jul

Inspired by a good friend (who like me had been blogging secretly until yesterday – see Links), I have at last decided to tell the world about my activities online and let you all into my mind. Not even my husband knew what I was up to – in fact I am still waiting for him to notice. It took him a couple of days to spot the dirty words spelt out on the fridge with magnetic letters (I hope our god fearing cleaners didn’t notice – the shame!) so I’m not too hopeful for a pat on the back soonish.

I nearly changed my mind about going ‘live’. As I sat on the train home yesterday my eye was drawn to a newspaper on the seat next to me. Kym Marsh had been papped with her top off. But, no,  it wasn’t that. “20 times more boobs than the Sun or the Star!” a flash on the front page boasted. How on earth could I compete with that? My little blog where the only tits are likely to be blue-tits and the only boobs will be spelling errors.

So here it is. My little blog in the big bad world! More fluff than you’ll find in Mr Terry Towelling’s bellybutton.  Do enjoy.

Am I already out there?

29 Jun

I’m only on post #2 and already I discover I’m not as original or clever as I thought. Searching for my blog (to see if it works on my mobile of course) I find that someone has already adopted the fanastic, amazing and original blog title Full-time Everything. What’s more they’ve added a couple of extra words to the title that hone it to exactly what I meant mine to convey. Oh gone on – rub it in! Even the topics they’re covering are what I’m most likely to blog about. And to top it all off – they even look like me! Unbelievable. I don’t feel like I’m in a parallel universe. It’s worse than that.  I feel like whatever I write they will have written it before me. Probably the day before. Most probably better than me.

PS. In a huff I have since changed my blog title to Crumbs and Pegs. Not an entirely random collection of words (the title that is – the posts could indeed be described as such depending on how much you like them). Explanation at a later date …

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